Residente released this song last week, confessing he started writing it after one night he felt so bad he just wanted to throw himself out of a balcony and didn't know why, he just called his mother and had a friend stay over at his hotel and the next morning started writing it.
The song is heart wrenching, he basically confesses every bit of his emotional pain, his divorce, his solitude, the memories of all the friends he has lost, his childhood friend, Christopher killed by four policemen, half his art school friends also dead...
But he also talks about his tendency towards drinking, his wounds about being persecuted in Puerto Rico, not being able to have his grandmother see him perform at the stadium before dying, feeling completely empty in the middle of his concerts and sick of the music industry but forced to perform.
The song is beautiful but also feels like a giant cry for help, he confesses he thinks he's better at writing songs while drunk than sober, also constantly speaks of his need to disappear, to stop existing, his need to avoid the immense pain of the present, his longing for the past, the moments when his life was simpler but happier.
The song is a big cry, a beautiful portrait of the gigantic amount of emotional pain and wounds most people carry throughout the years without ever being able to solve them, or even confront them, just going through the days, trying to ignore the pain, day by day.
People have been so deeply touched by this song, by these words, by Rene's mother singing at the beginning and end of the song, talking to her infant son, trying to make him study with her, the immense cry of Ruben Blades' voice singing along the final bits of music.
It's exactly the same emotional state that destroyed my father in his final years, it's the same weight I myself have dealt with most of my life, my sister too.
But there's a way out, there's another road beyond the pain and I decided to take it many years ago, I knew that path would destroy me, completely, there's only so much pain one can carry before one can no longer see anything else. So I decided to stop ignoring it, decided to feel my wounds and root them deeply in the present, started noticing that the pain is a lot smaller when you only feel it in the moment and not have your mind constantly feeling it back in your whole past, I discovered there's a point the pain gets ready to leave you and you can start accepting what happened and move on.
There's a bigger weight sensitive people carry, we can feel our wounds and the weight of all of our ancestor's wounds, we have made the conscious choice to carry all this weight for our lineage, some of us have noticed it and are decided to heal it all, release all that pain and allow our ancestors to finally rest in peace.
I know many of you might relate to this, all of us share a collective pain as well, all of this is the reason we live in a world that's in crisis, I know you can feel that pain and that's why I know I can give you hope and remind you that pain is always temporary, always. No matter how much you feel it right now, no matter how broken you think you are, how destroyed beyond fix, beyond relief you think you are... It's all temporary, it is, it really is, I promise. Trust me, there's always something better coming, when you have a bit of patience and endurance and learn to accept the pain you realize that there's always a way out, a way up, a way to heal, there's nothing you can't heal and recover from, it really doesn't matter how long it takes, you can do it.
You can even manage to turn your pain into something as beautiful as this song, capable of moving so many people's hearts and allowing them to release their own pain, this song is just an example of the power and beauty of the human soul, that is capable of doing something so meaningful and touching even in the worst crisis, the strongest, most painful hell.
So let's deep gratitude towards Residente's soul and his decision to not only not throwing himself out the balcony but turning that moment into this, a piece of art worth so much to so many, this is a great opportunity for many of us to start healing, beyond the pain there's always a new opportunity.
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About the Curator - Henry Gonzalez
Musician from Colombia, constantly inspired and moved by music and trying to express it in the best way posible, trying to find common souls who get as transformed by music and sound as he does.
Music can be a spiritual experience, you just have to find the right one.
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